You knowhow sometimes, out of the blue

You know how sometimes, out of the blue, some thing or someone suddenly reminds you of an unpleasant thing, person or place, it’s because you have been triggered.

You may have noticed the same thing happening to friends and/or family. If this happens just change the subject and suggest you have a tea or coffee or go for a walk with them. Just be in a safe place with them.

Don’t tell them to get over it, because they can’t. Also please don’t say “oh you’ve been triggered” that can cause a full-blown meltdown.

Triggers exist where something was buried deeply, instead of being processed and stored away normally.

Instead, it was stored as feelings in your body. You haven’t allowed yourself to feel those emotions and put them to rest.

It’s quite normal to not even be aware that the thing ever happened until something triggered it and those feelings came flooding back, catching you totally by surprise. Someone said this to me once, then she went on digging.
Fortunately, I had the skills to deal with it and I floated back to find a very angry 2-year-old who felt abandoned when my mother needed to be in hospital for several weeks then came home with a new baby. That turned out to be a real help in understanding some of my family dynamics.

When this happens, it’s good to go to a quiet safe place and allow yourself to settle down. You may be able to let your mind to drift back and see if you can resolve the thing. Otherwise ask for help.

Some people have lots of things that trigger them, and I suggest in that case skilled help is needed.

If you come to me, I help you to go into a deep trance where you can find the problem and just let it go. Yes, it is that easy. The look of joy when they open their eyes and tell me, yes, it is over. It all went and the pain has gone.

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