“Yes, I am wise, but it is wisdom born of pain” is a line from Helen Reddy’s song “I am woman” and it is so very true of me. It is also what makes me a very good trauma therapist.
I had the experience of spending many years living with complex PTSD, being disabled as a small child wearing callipers to my waist and dyslexic.
Having had a bad start, I was vulnerable and had abusive marriages plus breast cancer and many broken bones. This is a pattern that I see in so many of my anxiety and trauma clients.
Recovering and letting go of the past gave me the wisdom to truly understand where anxious and traumatised clients are coming from. My absolute passion is helping people who have been bullied and abused to become the stronger, wiser selves they were always meant to be.
As so many of you know, I am fine now. I am stronger and healthier than many people my age and I am very happy. Occasionally something comes up that triggers difficult memories, but I know how to deal with it and I fix it fast.
The lockdown and covid fear in March and April 2020 was difficult for me but I suspect this was the case for many others as well. When the latest lockdown was announced I shouted an expletive 3 times then I felt good and got on with being busy. The expletive was all I needed to let go.
The real purpose of my Escape from Anxiety online program is to give extra training in ongoing resilience.
One of the many extra training courses I did was given by an American Psychotherapist who drummed it home that healing trauma is all about feeling and for it to work the client needs to feel that I feel what they feel. That is so true.
In fact, difficult and traumatic memories are held in the body as feelings, not verbalised and never stored in normal way we store memories.
Anxiety, emotions and feelings are held in our bodies, not in our conscious mind and they need to be treated this way. The problem with the more common cognitive therapy is that it is very slow and if it works at all it is because it is about gradually desensitising the conscious memories as it “pendulums” and keeps revisiting the pain. I won’t do this. I help you to let it go without revisiting.