I love Christmas and enjoy looking for thoughtful gifts for my special people at this time of the year but beware of the pattern of behaviour at Christmas. Gifts don’t have to be expensive, just thoughtful.
However the pattern I see in many people is forgetting about the fact that THEY matter, running out of time and money and even cancelling their own care – they don’t want to “waste” time and money on themselves.
If you are falling into this trap please stop and remember that YOU matter and take care of yourself.
Christmas can be amazing fun but it can also be very stressful. We don’t get to choose our relatives or our in-laws and then we all sit down together in a defined space and hope it works.
The underlying anxieties and in many families, past traumas are all there. The unintended insults from many years ago come up especially when people give a repeat present that caused an unacknowledged upset in a previous year… or many previous years, upsets again.
Then we eat too much, we drink too much. The cooking doesn’t work out as perfectly as it does on the TV commercials and the Chef programs. This kids get sick or just overtired and lose the plot. It happens…
Keep your expectations realistic, relax and stay calm. It pays to be relaxed and calm when you arrive.
There is still time for people who know there may be a problem and who want to take care of themselves first, before Christmas so that they can make sure that they stay calm enough to enjoy what should be a lovely day.