“Yes, I am wise, but it is wisdom born of pain” is a line from Helen Reddy’s song “I am woman” and it is so true of me. It is also what makes me a very good trauma and anxiety therapist.
I had the experience of spending many years living with complex PTSD, being disabled as a small child wearing calipers to my waist and dyslexic. I was the two-year old I talked about last week.
Having had a bad start, I was vulnerable and had 3 abusive marriages plus breast cancer and many broken bones. I see this sort of pattern in so many of my anxiety and trauma clients. Bullies are attracted to vulnerable people they can bully. They recognise the body language.
Recovering gave me the wisdom to truly understand where anxious and traumatised clients are coming from. Yes, it is wisdom born of pain. Now my absolute passion is helping people who have been bullied and abused to become the stronger, wiser selves they were always meant to be and to be able to move on into healthier lives and relationships.
As so many of you know, I am fine now. I am stronger and healthier than many people my age and I am very happy. Occasionally something comes up that triggers difficult memories, but I know how to deal with it and I fix it fast. The lockdown, isolation and covid fear in March and April was difficult for me but I suspect this was the case for many others as well.
The real purpose of my Escape from Anxiety online program is to give extra training in ongoing resilience, and it includes training in self-hypnosis.
One of the many extra training courses I did was given by an American Psychotherapist who said that healing trauma is all about feeling and for it to work the client needs to feel that I feel what they feel. That is so true.
Anxiety, emotions and feelings are held in our bodies, not in our conscious mind and they need to be treated this way. This is why hypnotherapy works. The problem with the more common cognitive therapy is that it is very slow and if it works at all it is because it is about gradually desensitising the conscious memories as it “pendulums” and keeps revisiting the pain. I won’t do this, it re-traumatises every visit.
I’m loving having some warm weather. There is nothing quite like being able to get outdoors and my dog is only too happy to take me for her daily walk. They are building a set of 16 new townhouses on the route we most often walk and there are lots of new things for her to sniff and for me to watch.
Check me out and be a friend on Facebook. I make a conscious effort to put positive posts up most days.